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40 years on

  

There I was drinking my Wine cocktail

When beside me what should I hear

A voice, I remembered, that of a male.

We were lovers for a number of years.


Hi, he said, looking at me with a frown.

Long time no see, Peter, I think!

He nodded, then quickly sat down

Saying could I join you for a drink


Well of course says I, haven’t seen you for years.

he replies, since you walked out on me

Left me lost, devastated, angry, in tears.

I thought we were happy, weren’t we?. 


As if it were yesterday I remembered my past

And what led to me leaving this person

I was an outsider, a miserable outcast.

I needed a worthier version.


The world called to me from my sad little life

For I knew if I stayed I’d stagnate.

I was destined to become a boring young wife.

Filled with sadness, loathing, self-hate


I left him and found there’s a place I could be

Full of adventure and laughter and joy

I travelled around, I was happy and free

Never giving a thought to that boy.


Forty years on, I have no regret

I am back to where it began

There is one thing though, I cannot forget

Is the hurt that I caused this old man.


What should I say, what can I do

To ease the pain in his eyes

For all the hurt that I caused you

I wondered, do I need to apologise


No! I give him a nod, and finish my wine

Saying nothing more to this man

I walked out on him for a second time

Never wanting to see him again 

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